Yesterday I sat down in Sunday school. I arrived a little late due to dropping Klair off in nursery, so I had to improvise to figure out where the rest of the class was reading from in the Bible. I heard the teacher say "Fear not Mary" while reading aloud, so I quickly pulled up my scripture app and typed this phrase in to see if I could find where they were (isn't technology great?) There were several hits for these words in the New Testament, so I started reading through them. As I read, I realized how frequently this exact phrase (or a variation of it) was given to Mary. As I read on, suddenly, it seemed that these words---this counsel and comfort--were being spoken to me too.
I know that my situation is not the same as Mary's--not even close. Yet, she is someone that I feel like I can identify with, especially now while I'm pregnant. I might not be carrying the Savior of the world, but I am carrying one of God's sons and currently raising one of his daughters. I'm both beyond grateful and utterly terrified by these tasks. In the grand scheme of things the impact that I can have as a mother--whether good or bad--is monumental in the lives of my children, likely beyond my ability to comprehend. I already feel so overwhelmed at times, and baby boy isn't even born yet. It's easy to fall into the trap of fear, anxiety, and feelings of self-doubt. My poor husband has had to listen to me sob on more than one occasion as I recount to him all of my inadequacies and failings. They plague my mind lately, but reading this today assured me that I don't have to let them.
I find comfort knowing that Mary--arguably the most important and influential woman of all time-- also had her own fears, her own doubts. I find comfort in the words repeatedly given to this remarkable woman who had the weight of the world on her shoulders, because I know that they apply to me too--in my own little world, as heavy as it may seem.
"I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up."
(Doctrine and Covenants 84:88)
(While I was looking up scripture references for this post I also came across this wonderful talk written by Elder Todd R. Callister of the Seventy called "Fear Not"--it touches on this exact topic perfectly.)
I was brought up in a dynamic, supporting family unit where learning was pleasurable, and I never felt fear in making inquiries, in not understanding a lesson. I just said I required help and got it. My restricting companion in this level headed discussion was raised by outside guardians. Payday Loans Chicago
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